Eggies to Embies- They Grow Up So Fast!

The weekend is winding down and I am realizing what a blog slacker I have been. My wonderful husband was kind of enough to post this update while I was unconscious and having my eggs removed and was even nice enough to allow me to be the one to share the results of said egg retrieval but I waited until now to actually post an update. Bad blogger.

As Chad so kindly reported, I was pretty fearless going into the procedure, but that it must be said how easy that is to do when you're asleep before they even wheel you into the operating room. I remember the anesthesiologist telling me he was putting "the good stuff" into my IV and the next thing I knew he was shaking my shoulder telling me it was time to wake up. And as quick as it felt, I later learned it really was almost that fast. I rested for a bit and got some much needed pain meds for the aching in my abdomen, and then it was time to be on our way. Dr Jedi had been out to let Chad know all had gone well, and they would be calling shortly to let us know how many eggs were retrieved.

My phone rang even before we got home and we got the very exciting news that 21 eggs had been retrieved! The left ovary caused absolutely no problems and he had full access to all of my follicles! Nothing left to do but go home, rest and wait for a call the next morning to tell us the overnight fertilization report.

Early in the process of our IVF journey, Chad and I spent a week talking to our doctor, consulting books and websites and discussing with each other whether or not to utilize intracytoplasmic sperm injection i.e. ICSI, in this cycle. For those that don't know, ICSI is basically the process of directly injecting a single sperm into an egg to cause fertilization. After weighing the pros and cons and taking into account Chad's high motility, we decided against ICSI because we felt that given the choice, we'd prefer the eggs to fertilize more closely to how they would inside my body. But we also knew that we still ran the risk that fertilization would fail. No one knows why but even with healthy sperm and eggs there are times when the embryologist comes in the morning after and finds that fertilization has completely failed. Needless to say, we were a bit anxious for the phone call that would deliver the news of whether such a fate had befallen our 21 little eggies.

Luckily, the call came quickly on Saturday morning and we learned that of the 21 eggs retrieved 15 had fertilized! 15! I was so excited and relieved to hear that number! The nurse told me that this most likely meant we would be doing a day 5 blastocyst transfer on Wednesday, but to be on stand-by for the possibility of a day 3 transfer on Monday. She said they would call me at about 10 o'clock Monday morning with another update.

So we spent the rest of the weekend as if it was just any other weekend. Lunch with friends, afternoon nap, picnic in the park, but really we both know this hasn't been any other weekend. I keep thinking about my embies. I keep wondering how they're doing. If they are growing and how quickly. I wonder how many are boys and how many are girls, which ones have the DNA for my nose and Chad's ears. I already feel so attached, so maternal.

We drove past the center where we know they are last night, and couldn't help but say hi to them as we did so. We told them we hope they are doing well and that we are so excited to know they are there. It is a truly surreal feeling to know my potential children exist, they are dividing and growing and they are doing it outside of body, about 20 miles away as a matter of fact. It makes me feel like I already am pregnant in a way, just not physically. I have loved my child since before we even started trying to concieve, but now that I know embryos exist that are made up of me and Chad, I can't help but feel my heart swell even more. It is truly a miracle to know that we (with the help of a wonderful team of doctors and embryologists) have created life that is part me and part him. It exists in this world and it just blows me away every time I think about it. What blows me away even more is how much I already love them.

RE Appt Part 1: A New Hope

Well our last try with the OB was a bust so it's on to the Reproductive Endocrinologist aka RE. Having to seek a specialist's help definitely conjures up a mixture of emotions. Part of me is hopeful that this will be just the thing to get us to where we need to be and fulfill our dreams of becoming parents, and part of me feels like a failure for needing this extra help. But I was still eager to meet with a doctor sooner rather than later which is why I was so grateful that my insurance provided me with a list of in network RE's and I found one that could not only get me in the same week, but the doctor also has stellar reviews from past patients on yahoo local. Of 18 reviews, 17 gave him 5 stars and the 18th gave him 4.

After meeting with Dr. Lee on Friday, I can confirm that those reviews were well deserved. His staff his friendly and helpful and he is hands down the best doctor I have ever had the pleasure of having a conversation with. Chad and I both clicked with him instantly and felt very comforted by his manner and approach. We discussed all of our previous testing and Dr. Lee proclaimed Chad to have "super sperm" as he has higher than average count and motility, something that definitely put a little smile on Chad's face. We also reviewed what we've done up until this point and then I had a little visit with wandy. Never my favorite part of any doctor visit but Dr Lee made the process more comfortable for me and was very good about showing us both what was on screen and explaining everything. He then assured me that my ovaries are "fantastic" and my eggs look good enough to be used for donation. Needless to say, Chad and I both felt pretty good about our reproductive odds after hearing that both our basic baby-making ingredients are in tip-top shape.

The problem was still my tubes. It was figuring out how much of a hindrance they are that was the we needed. Dr. Lee couldn't see any problems with my tubes on the ultrasound which is a good sign but he wanted to review the HSG films with us and get an accurate picture of what is happening with my plumbing. So he instructed us to get a copy from the radiology office and come in to review then with him and then discuss our options.

We raced out of there and had the films within half an hour. Unfortunately, Chad had to get back to work so we couldn't review the films the same day but we were able to schedule RE appt part 2 for Monday morning. It was wonderful to leave that office feeling hopeful again. We know that there will still be work to be done but it's great to know that despite our challenges we actually do have some things going for us. And it's great to know that we have a doctor that seems to really care about our success. I am showing my geek side here, but I feel like Dr. Lee is our Luke Skywalker, using the force of his experience and passion to defeat the dark side of our fertility and help us to have a baby. Well at the very least, he has definitely given us new hope that we will succeed soon.