Thursday, June 24, 2010

The 4 C's: Cramps, Crankiness, Cravings & Crazies

I wish I had an update that AF had arrived, but no such luck. And it seems that all of this waiting has made me a little crazy, envisioning AF as less of an "aunt" and more of an evil trickster faerie that enjoys toying with me.

Today it seems that she has doused me with her infamous mood swing dust. I have gone from almost smiling to all out ugly cry face in 30 seconds flat this afternoon, and not for any significant reason. I was also irrationally annoyed and snappy with Chad yesterday. This could be a good sign, right? I'll be honest, it has been easy to push me to the emotional edge these past two months, I mean it's not like you have to push far- I live pretty close to that edge lately, but still I do feel a bit more hormonally moody today. I also have had some intense junk and chocolate cravings. A fudge brownie sundae sounds like a great dinner option right now. And maybe I am just imagining symptoms but I swear I am starting to feel some tummy cramps too, unless it is just all those crunches I did this morning...

Once a paranoid symptom checker... Even when the symptoms I am hunting and hoping for are AF and not pregnancy symptoms I can't help but over-analyze every mood, every twinge, every craving. Old habits really do die hard I guess. But it does seem as if I am starting to see all 4 C's in the symptom checklist, cramps, cravings, crankiness and crazies. If these really are pre-AF symptoms, then in just a few short weeks I will be back to paranoid symptom checking for pregnancy.

Wow, that really just hit me for the first time. Yes, I am still annoyed and slightly bitter that it's been taking so long for the evil AF faerie to pay me a visit, but I am so excited that once she does finally show, this FET is on! No cycle of BCP beforehand, no egg retrieval just a few quick checks of my uterine lining, a couple weeks of meds then BAM! transfer time. Wow that really is exciting! And I am so ready to do it.

Now I need the evil AF faerie to show! But how to get her here? The tooth fairy is after teeth, so maybe if I leave a negative HPT under my pillow tonight she'll send her "monthly gift" to me by morning? It does seem like she has already started sending her favorite gags my way. I just need to be sure she knows that even though her presence is welcome and wished for now, I have no desire to see her heartbreaking glare or any of her tricks after this transfer. I am ready to put this crazy silliness of mine to use having fun with my kids, and I will gladly put the other 3 C's to use during the 9 month process of bringing my child into the world.


***UPDATE*** As I hoped the AF faerie came last night! I don't feel like quite like a kid on Christmas, or even one that just had a visit from the tooth fairy since is a mixed blessing of sorts what with the cramps and all, but I am pretty excited. I have my first appointment for this cycle this afternoon! That's TODAY! YAY I'M STARTING FET!!!!!

14 comments:

Gia said...

So glad you are back to blogging! I am praying for you!

Courtney said...

*hugs* my friend. I hope this next step of your journey is incredibly peaceful.

<3

The Quest For Baby Hang said...

I am so excited for your FET!!! I can't wait until you get your BFP!!! *hugs*

Sharoni said...

YAY!!!!!!

Tillie said...

OMG YAY!!!!!!! So happy AF finally showed up and you can start FET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Holy monkey balls Holly!!!!!!!!

Erin said...

Awesome! So glad that AF decided to show her face!

WannabeMom said...

YAY!!!!! SOOOO glad that AF came and you can start your FET!

lowfatlady said...

I am so glad she finally showed. I love your imagery of af as an evil fairy.

T said...

WOOOOHOOO!!!! Come on FET!

Callieflower said...

I'm so happy for you!!!! It's on!

BonnieAnn said...

Just read your blog and saw you on twitter....I am starting the IVF battle myself...reaching out to other people that are going through the same thing as I am...I am waiting for AF to arrive as well to start the lupron...

Such a long road ahead...fingers crossed for both of us

Jen @ After The Alter said...

As funny as it sounds I"m so glad AF showed! I guess your symptoms check was correct! Good luck on starting your FET! I wish you nothing but the best of luck.

Anonymous said...

So glad AF showed up, and prayers are with you as you start FET again!

Waiting Lisa said...

I am so excited for you!!!